The Morning After

I guess that last post qualifies as the obligatory emo post for this blog. It was a situation where I needed to say what I said to someone at a moment when I couldn't contact anyone....so, you were it. I told a friend the night before that crying is healthy when you need to release that emotion. I took that advice after the post and it didn't fail me.

I woke up early this morning to go for a run. There is a really nice track right behind the barracks that runs through the woods. To set the scene you need to understand that where I am is in a very rural part of the state. There isn't much around the camp and the camp is very large, with lots of woods and empty space. That makes it very dark at night. 

When I walked out to the track it was still night and the coolness in the air felt great. The leg of the track that is closest to the barracks is somewhat lit by the buildings, but you can't see any of the rest of the track because of the woods. I stretched and started my run. As I headed into the woods it got very dark....dark enough to where I was wondering if I was going to be able to see where I was going.

As I rounded a corner, the track took me into an opening in the trees and the track was illuminated by the star light. I looked up and it was amazingly beautiful! There were so many stars and they were so bright and clear. I could clearly see the little dipper constellation among all the stars. It was just one of those moments of awe when you look at the world around you and are just amazed. I felt so thankful for being right there at that moment of time. That set the tone for a great run.  

I still have twinges of sadness this morning, but I am okay with that. I hope I never get to the point where love, loss...life...doesn't affect me. I want to feel, its just not as much fun on days like yesterday. I still miss my friends. I still wish I could have been there in a more meaningful way, to perhaps change the outcome, but all I can do is move forward and try to do the best that I can with each day that I am given...to enjoy the friends and family that I have and the blessings that often come unexpectedly.